Have you ever saved a life?
"Have you ever saved a life?"
That's the question my 11-year-old daughter asked me, out of nowhere, as we walked to school a few months ago. In the immediate split second, before my mouth could open, I felt first. The feeling was angst, anxiety, maybe even dread. Then, before I could say a word, a second wave washed over me: pride, worth, purpose. It's hard to describe how or why those feelings were even present in response to such a simple question. Was it that anyone would feel that way when asked "Have you ever saved a life?" Or was it the nature of my work, a field that deals in life and death and in all the nuance and circumstance that makes up everything in between?
As a vascular neurologist, my job is to do everything possible, medically, ethically, humanistically, to help people survive what is not infrequently the worst day of their lives. The split-second decisions, the second-guessing, and the brutal reality that around a fifth of the patients I care for in the hospital will die today, tomorrow, or sometime in the next three months.
So when I finally opened my mouth, I didn't really know what to say. Logically, yes, I have probably been part of a team that has "saved" hundreds of lives. But internally, in my gut, I felt absolutely torn.
Our field is hard to describe in lives saved. Maybe because doing so means we also have to acknowledge the lives lost. We have to see the thousands who have died on our watch, not because of something we did, but because we are in the brutal business of caring for stroke. If you are a health provider, I suspect you can relate to the dichotomy: we are called to help people, but often the circumstances are far beyond our grasp and we are simply there to support. Support the patient. Support the family. Support a colleague.
But as a layperson, the question takes on a different meaning entirely.
Earlier today I was cooling off from a morning run, looking down at my phone, when I nearly tripped over a middle-aged man wearing a button-up shirt, khaki pants, and a baseball cap, lying across the sidewalk and halfway into the street, spread across an on-ramp. He was clearly overdosing on an opiate. Mouth open, head back, breathing shallow.
By then I could hear the sirens of a fire truck. The emergency workers came with the naloxone kit, administered it nasally, and there's a good chance a life was saved.
I started SMARTS Health because I no longer want to face that 40-year-old man or 50-year-old woman with a devastating stroke that I know for a fact could have been prevented with simple blood pressure management, started years earlier.
"Nobody ever thanks you for saving them from the disease they didn't know they were going to get."
William Foege, former CDC DirectorThat's the work. And it's enough.
Doctor C





